it's 2.25am

It's 2.25am.
I think i'm waiting to fall asleep instead of going to sleep. Like everything else i have ever wanted, i'm more comfortable waiting than going after it. Food. Toys. Grades. Friends. Affection. Perhaps attention as well as praise. I guess I should say I'd prefer waiting for the opportunity than creating the opportunity. I'm always hopeful for something to happen. Always glad if it happens. So who am i currently?

Definitely not a go-getter. Absolutely not ambitious. Although I have dreams, I'm not encouraged to pursue them. I'm rather uninspiring like one of those leaves falling of a tree, a leaf amongst a thousands other leaves fleeting aimlessly till they hit the ground without so much as a sound audible to the human ears. If you blink, you'll miss me. If you don't blink, you'll still miss me, most likely. But I know I have a story. A path to walk. I have a story and I intend to tell it when the time comes. When the time comes. For now, I think I am a sleeping beauty. Not particularly the beauty as some one might argue. Mostly, the sleeping if i can get everyone to agree on that. Indeed, I'm the sleeping whatever-it-is-that's-not-too-girly-or-fairy-tale-like-sleeping-beauty. The truth remains. I'm sleeping.

So this blog should help me discover some bits and pieces of the real me, those shards of materials capable of reflecting and shedding and shinning and firing and *insert appropriate gerund here* light into who I am. I don't need a kiss. I don't need a hero. I don't need a soft touch to my hand or a longing voice to my heart. I only need enough light on face to know It's morning and it's time to wake up. Get up. And live.

The moment I meet those pieces of me, I will let you know.

Night, for now.